I’ve always found it hard to give people key pieces of information – the highlights.
I particularly noticed it during my corporate career – I wasn’t diagnosed autistic and ADHD at the time. On so many occasions, my managers asked for just the information they needed to know.
I’d give all the info – as much detail as I had. Moreover, I thought that if I just said it really quickly, it wouldn’t take up as much time, and the person/people could pick out what they needed.
Fast forward to post-diagnosis, and I realised my neurodivergent brain couldn’t pick out what information was important. I still struggle to this day.
I find it incredibly difficult to filter information and decipher what’s important.
Have you experienced the same thing? How do you deal with it in the moment?
I’ve come to realise I can’t.
If I’m put on the spot, I now accept that I’m not able to filter information in a way that gives a specific person only what I believe they need to know. Why? Because I don’t know what they need to know.
If that’s something you grapple with, maybe you’d like to try the following…
I usually say “Can I come back to you? I need to give it some thought and will follow up with the information I believe is critical for you.”
I go away and think about the purpose of the information I’m sharing.
Who am I giving it to? What’s the reason for sharing it?
And then I try and pick out three to five pieces of information I believe will be useful for them.
I always add a note that says, “If you need anything further, please let me know.”
There are still occasions when I share information that’s totally irrelevant.
At the same time, I can miss things out, too.
But at least if I have time to reflect, I’m more likely to go in the right direction, and I give people the opportunity to ask for more information.
I’d love to know how you deal with situations like that.
I really struggle, and I’ve spoken to so many other neurodivergent women who also find it challenging.
It’s very difficult to work out what someone will find the most useful.
Do you have any tips, tools or techniques around picking out important information?
Please share them – the more we support each other, the more we normalise our challenges and experiences.
It also takes away the shame, embarrassment and frustrations.
Picking out the important facts to share with other people isn’t easy.
I’d love to start a conversation and hear your thoughts on this post.
Feel free to get in touch: reach out to me on my socials @autisticjoyologist / Nikki Butler – The Autistic Joyologist | Facebook or email me at [email protected].
Nikki x